How to Build Rapport Copy

We know that we always communicate. We have seen that it is possible to improve the quality of interactions by paying attention to words and gestures; we have begun to understand the importance of building good relationships with others.

In reality, it is pretty easy to understand what works and what doesn’t work. So much so that, at times, it is natural and spontaneous to create Rapport. Just think about what bothers and pleases us; for example, situations where the person you’re dealing with never lets you talk. Or is she distracted by phone calls or text messages during the conversation? Some people try to import their thoughts or tend to judge you, to manipulate you; others complain about everything or interrupt you while you speak, and so on.

Instead, think about the people with whom the conversation is comfortable. They are likely open-minded, willing to question their point of view, show respect for others, are capable of listening and are characterised by spontaneous human warmth, empathy, consistency and positivity.

All these things come from the tone of voice, facial expressions and body language; only a part of the message comes from the words used.

However, the use of the techniques suggested by NLP has a fundamental problem: Authenticity.

Selling, convincing, resolving disputes and confronting are topics of many courses and books. Still, the truth is that it becomes easy to lose the sense of one’s individuality when you start using new techniques to create Rapport.

It is true what is explained on this topic, as the techniques described are undoubtedly effective. Still, it is equally valid that the result will appear false and constructed if they do not adapt to your personality. The most important advice is to focus on the dialogue, live the moment while remaining involved, and open your mind to the point of view of others by collecting all the possible elements to get a clear picture of the situation. Only in the next phase, when you build the right attitude, when you can evaluate the body language of others and manage your own, will you be able to start trying some of the techniques you have studied.

We will find that refraining from interrupting and knowing how to listen is not precisely spontaneous. Mirroring and matching are not simple to use without appearing strange or false. It is necessary to study and practice little by little because the goal is to modify, until it becomes natural, an approach of limiting dialogue that is deeply rooted in each of us. We achieve the result when we get the best out of interactions, not to convince anyone that we are always right.

Therefore, the construction of a good relationship passes through the rules of good education, authenticity, involvement and techniques that lead to lower the communication barriers naturally present in all of us.